this was like watching a trainwreck, but a slow leisurely trainwreck in the English countryside

the writing is flawless, and as few novels do, this one has the tightness of a short story

where you get the sense that nothing is superfluous

Stevens is an incredibly frustrating character, I might like him less than most people do, or less than intended

but I suppose I have a lack of patience for certain kinds of behavior

it is a very tragic story though, and the expected moments toward the end, where he admits all the things he has tried to narrate his way around before, are very affecting

though you realize you've been waiting for this revelation for so long that it hardly seems like anything

and he's said so little in his life that really comes from himself

(what it really means, to "not take one's clothes off in public")

that when he does have a moment of honesty, like thinking "my heart is breaking"

it doesn't seem real, or at least it takes a moment to believe

what really strikes me, I guess, is how solipsistic his version of self-obliteration is

that on one level it's all about the ideal of what he thinks he should be, to the point where he comes off as cruelly indifferent to someone who cares about him

and cruelly unaware of himself

but that in itself is selfish because it's always driven by this all-important goal of doing what he thinks he should do

except it's not rewarding at all because he doesn't understand it, or doesn't try to

as for the political side of the story I think what shows through most is the danger of not having an informed opinion

and it's sadly ironic that Stevens proves his own viewpoints right by not being on the right side of things

there's a little hint, possibly, that Ishigurou is not committing to any particular view as the answer

in the character of the doctor who is kind of enigmatic--but I get the feeling that he is supposed to represent

someone who is intelligent and who does question things and try to be informed

but for reasons that aren't delved into, is dissatisfied anyway

I think those are all my thoughts for now...might add more later

next I will be reading some kind of airport bestseller of the week for the very justifiable reason that I feel like it

and because if I go on to the next Mantel book I don't trust myself to not make indecorous comments about Thomas Cromwell yet