which just about says it all in regards to how much i actually wanted to go orz

he was vaguely cute in how he set up his profile (he pretended to be a superhero)

but uh

i know literally nothing about him and just said yes because he wasn't a creep

and also he's not really my type, appearance wise, which is shallow of me but...yeah

gonna have to reschedule with him one way or another

to be fair he texted me the night we agreed to meet next week and hasn't since then so he might not be all that invested

and lol i asked if he could make it from DC to Fairfax and he was like YEAH how do i get there via metro and i'm just like oh no honey that is way too much effort for us to meet up if we don't like each other

(which hey maybe he likes me but at least i have shit on my profile about myself)

hhh gotta think bout how to handle this one

part of me feels like this is a "beggars can't be choosers" situation and i should feel happy taht anybody wants to go out with me

(who is less than 30 because omfg why do all these 30+ year old guys keep messaging me)

but yeah that might be the low self esteem talking

i'm allowed to not be attracted to people right

hhh idk i'm gonna go play with my farm and sleep i guess

I would like to point out that I'm 31 and haven't dated anyone since I was 19. It's allowed to not be married off or anything.

Lol I know. I just get sad about not having a SO or even just having sex, so i feel silly about it. I might've tried a one night stand with him if I had the set up for it tbh

but i don't want to go to his place since it's so far away and my room has no door :T so

but yeah it's more like, i complain so much and now i'm rejected the one guy who wanted me???? and i realize that that's me like, putting words in the mouths of observers who don't exist