So long saga short: my father made me take out student loans for undergrad and my rich grandmother didn't know and is making him pay my loans

I have 40k$ in student loan debt for undergrad they're insisting they pay even though I've asked them repeatedly not to because I'm uncomf w it

I agreed under extreme duress after two months of fighting to let them do so but only with a signed written agreement that I would not be in debt to them for it

Because you know 40,000$ is a fucklot of money and I want something in writing that says it was not coercion and that I'm not responsible

My grandmother has decided she will not sign it

My father rewrote the whole thing and will only sign the version that takes out the full detailed explanation of what I'm not responsible for

I've locked them out of my loan account (all loans are in my name) and I'm not letting them in until it's in writing

They insist they don't need to sign anything because "if I trusted them/loved them/had any gratitude" then I wouldn't need it in writing

I'm going to refuse to let them do it unless they sign and if they don't then they can't do it at all

They own the house we currently live in. We're moving on the 12th of August

My father is coming here to do renovations on the 6th

If I tell him that he can't pay it there's a nonzero chance he might try and evict us before the 12th or he might come here on the 6th and force me to let him pay the loans

And I dont

Know what to do

And I'm terrified and I don't have a therapist right now and k can't sleep

Help

honestly, i would let them pay. once the loans are paid, they're gone. i took out a few small loans in undergrad my mom paid in full to help me build credit

Yeah but the thing is if I do without the thing in writing I guarantee that it'll turn into

"We paid your loans and now you have to do everything we ask )" slash "you have to pay us back!!!"

directly from the federal government, and after the account was paid in full, it's gone. the US government sends a letter advising your payments are complete

yeah but.... like i hate saying this but if it isn't the loans, isn't it going to be something else?

Yeah...it is,

that's how family is. it doesn't matter how much you push back on one thing, it'll always BE something one way or another

It'll be the house thing if it isn't the loans

but in regards to say, if you cut them off, there's nothing they can do

they can't sue you, there's no grounds to pursue repayment since all payments are made in your name

I don't want to tho is the thing. Despite all of it this summer were still really close o-|--<

regardless of where you received the money

Yeah...that's kinda how I'm feeling but I just. Do not trust them

But at this point they've worn me down to just wanting to say yes do it do whatever so they'll leave me alone about it

yeah.... but there's not really any action they can take otherwise legally so... ?

ofc there's the extreme emotional aspect but, there is that security that in terms of the law

Yeah...you guys make a good point. I'm still kinda worried about my Awful Uncle deciding that the money will come out of my bequests but that's another problem for another day

Am I like...privileged and ungrateful because I don't want them todo this???

Everyone I know with loans desperately wants them paid off and here I am absolutely shit terrified of letting my family pay it off but they don't want to do it because they care about me they want to do it

Because they're ashamed of me and I just. It makes me feel so awful and they've been so awful about it

And all I feel like is that I'm an entitled asshole who can't take a gift when he sees it and that I have no room to complain akandndjs