Plus an hour of work so like

it was a busy day!

you have definitely done a lot of shit today

that sounds productive as fuck, good job!

Also the DRS person asked if I felt like if I didn't have depression/anxiety going on if I'd be able to do all this class stuff at once and like. Yeah.

I saw a tumblr joke once that was like 'look at all the shit I've done with depression... clearly god nerfed me so I wouldn't be OP' and I think about that a lot

It's deeply frustrating

Not that I feel like I accomplish a ton, just....that I feel such a difference in functionality it frustrates me to feel hobbled

I mean. I guess I feel it slightly differently. I'm prone to thinking of myself as a weakass piece of shit who couldn't survive anything

But I'm. I'm really not. I have survived my own brain doing the thing opposite of what it's supposed to do (if what we evolved to do is, y'know, survive)

I've done some coolass shit in my life AND I had to deal with playing on hard mode in my own brain to do that cool shit

I'm not a weakass piece of shit, I'm strong as hell. And do I wish I didn't have all of this shit and could not have all this shit going on? Of course. In an instant. But

And I mean you have done some coolass shit too. Like, holy shit, you take care of living things that DON'T thrive on neglect. Like. Shit, that's rad.

Not that it isn't frustrating as hell but. Like. I guess I feel like if you gotta ve stuck in hard mode at least sometimes people see it and acknowledge that you're playing on hard mode

But yeah I get why that wouldn't be a helpful phrase for ya

Oh, I didn't mean it that way, just that I don't accomplish as much as some people do with depression. It's something to adjust to, too. And I do think you're tough, you're managing to get more schooling than I did, and eventually I think that will make your life better