Sometimes he says things. And the people around him say, "Wow, that's so deep, you're like a philosopher!"

And then he puts these things he says onto cardstock and puts out stacks of them for customers to take home with them

because why wouldn't they want to do that, right

And they're all like this

This man has been out of the country since before I got hired. I know I'm going to meet him eventually but for now I keep hearing legends

I honest to god cannot wait to meet him because he just seems like such an over-the-top person

(I thought I met him once but nah different dude)