Good luck, everyone!
oh my god
This will be fun
everything's great. this is great.
i told you, fun! don't you guys love skeletons?!
looks at wayne
It's the curse of James Williams!
omfg
Dazai loves dead people
...just not this one
OH BOY
So, people are getting clothing from the stores to use as disguises, and Kino and Dazai are carrying the chest
OH SHIT IM LATE BUT
Is it correct?
You guys are lucky I stayed up till 1am for the Umineko thing and have tomorrow(today?) off
THAT SOUNDS RIGHT
Alright
collapses in here
yeah can we handwave that people went to go get clothes? like left, came back in 10 mins
Sorry he got you involved in a frame up?
Handwaved!
Said it was along the way
excellent
this is totally a trap
Suspects
This has to be a trap
there is no reality in which this is not a trap
itis most definitely a trap
robert installed cameras
everybody cheese it
the paparazzi are due ANY SECOND.
YUP
just Miller hops out SURPRISE
it's like one of those cakes, but it's a coffin instead
it's a plastic halloween skeleton
just lets Dazai handle this
everyone just backs away
and lets Dazai handle the whole thing
you got this Dazai
Dazai: wow I don't even want a medal
Dazai is ready to go down
also wow keet having your sword out
let him be attacked by a mob of angry villagers
Look, if something happens....
omg
I mean, Sakura, do you really want to sense a ghost in the same room as a skeleton
Maybe hawks will distract the paparazzi
Answer their undying questions
the trap is the ghosts get to haunt us in person
if it's supernatural maybe dazai can just touch it and kill it
oH MY GOD
So, this is how it'll go: this event will have three phases, each one lasting half an hour. In a moment the first phase will begin
Until then, have fun reacting!
I'm glad it was specifically sleep being interrupted so I could come out still wearing the earmuffs
oh
welp
this was not what i expected
WELP
I'm so sorry about Dazai
right now
i’m so glad about kino’s combo breaker
Also, jAmeS, dAviS
Same thing, hah!
same tho dazai... keith is all for just cutting him up and putting him back in the box.
Niwa is a mood
nobody will know......
I MEAN. It just says he can't leave.
It doesn't say he has to be alive
Yeah killing him is within the rules here
The rule about not harming townspeople is still active, by the way
Guys don’t kill the bartender
And Wayne wanted to dump it or burn it without looking......
well gee just ruin our fun, Sarge
anyway Kino has actually dealt with zombos??? so good thing he didn't look like that or she may well have just shot first and asked questions later 
keith is also familiar with zombos buuuuut he's still pointing swords at this one
time to wrassle a bartender?
wait, wait Wayne got this
we can all take turns sitting on him
i mean someone can knock him out again
i'm sure it's fine
So I'll be handling our named NPC during this event, and Nick will be handling more investigative things!
This is just like the time he said he had a girlfriend and was looking for her
mmmMMMMM
Y’ALL STOP IT
oh
gg guys
go distract em
Wayne can run?
EVERYBODY CHEESE IT
thats all i can think, im v helpful
get on the roof of the mausoleum theyll never look there
hOLY SHIT
come on Wayne let's get this place locked up
I missed that that was aimed at him
ahahha
Niwa...
Wayne has a gun but...
Wait I just realized that
Niwatori can make the target very easy to deal with
I'll keep updating any moves, so nobody misses them
TIME TO GUARD THE WINDOWS IG
I can't believe everyone is going to leave to fortify the place and Dazai's just gonna have some alone time with the NPC he would have killed
I've been hit bye world
dazai, as it turns out, is a terrifying person to wake up to interrogating you
people are busting into the windows by the way, does someone want to deal with that before Kino starts uh
doing things
I think we all know the sorts of things that happen when Kino does things
pfft, well Wayne's just brought up warning shots
so fun fact about those orange birds Niwa got as a regain
please tell me they explode
better!
?????????????
POISON BIRB
anyway yeah it's a warning shot that's what Kino's going to do
poisoning the townspeople seems bad
DYING BY HAND OF THE TOWNSPEOPLE ALSO MEANS BAD
SEEMS*
we're all just
doing our best here
why couldnt niwatori get some crows that peck at people that arent kind
hey it's only a little poison. they can just get paralyzed.
except maybe dazai
dazai just shoot them in the foot
but it's funny you ask that
about the crows 
peck their eyes out
Sky Burial | Juni Taisen
HAHAHA FUCK
Niwa's outfit is even more everything when in motion
*making progress in trying to get in
oh my god i didn't realize how skimpy her bottom outfit was until now
all of this Sucks
can we put dazai in the box
I mean. I'm 100% not surprised Dazai made him cry
yes. burn him alive. he's ready
put dazai in the box and give him to the mob
see look were giving davis back
but were not giving you the key
maybe itll distract them until morning!!
YEAH NIWA'S OUTFIT IS LITERALLY A BIKINI..........
I didn't want to be a weirdo by stressing how much it is a bikini
but
It cannot be stressed enough
The intensity of the assault on the windows is reduced!
I'm laughing, cause it's less than Futayo's thing and she's from a porn series.
Also, in fifteen minutes phase 2 will start
wait, Futayo's series is porn???
There's smut later on with other people. Aka murdernasty werewolf mom. The reason there's never going to be a 3rd season.
Oh, oops! Ignore that response, Des! deathdesu Didn't realizeNickalready got to you.
Man it would be funny if she lead Mason off though
oh uhhhhhhhhh i dont think i can justify having sting at the gy cause theres like no earthly way he would be cool with anything thats happening
sorry keith
yall gonna need to get someone else to move it
Oh that's okay i'll edit
o7
I think he'd be called off by the earlier one, so I'll drop a comment to you there, Des! 
hoho okay
holy fuck the townsfolk are going hard
and man suddenly I want a short-run AU game based on the reverse of the premise where everyone plays the townsfolk trying to deal with a bunch of people suddenly appearing in their town and messing everything up and killing each other
Oh my god that’s be great
Or even “au” because you’re residents in the vein of the mock round people who are still here
mainly because I had the sudden thought "ram it with a car is totally the type of plan DWRPers would come up with"
HONESTLY YEAH THAT'S A VERY MURDERGAME PLAYER SOLUTION
god this event how it all go so wrong so fast
so fast
Let's poison the driver 
Just shoot him and hope he spins out of control running them over. Or maybe it's GTA physics 
I mean. Nothing that is happening here is not bad
i think kino was trying to shoot out the tires
kino and dazai
Should we respond there as well?
The car hasn't arrived yet, it's approaching fast over there
this is going great
Responding ready to act may be good, though
GO GO GO SHOOT
Dazai is ready to act
Kino is also ready to act!
this is just like his good old mafia days... what a blessing
I had to leave for a bit, but what's the state of the windows/door?
doors been reinforced with the coffin lid, seems secure for now
are they sealed or just closed?
closed not sealed
well that's where the casino sky spotlights went
And also have access to the casino spotlights
Phase 2, go!
Half an hour
okay but are we taking our friend with us
does Dazai have to fling him over his shoulder
because he will
isnt mason not allowed to leave the gy though...
err not mason davis
And yeah, he's supposed to stay in the graveyard until 6AM
the description of him doing the worm is killing me
looking at my notes like "...well, okay, escape attempt is going to be a little hindered"
so you get this man doing the worm instead
LMAOASLKDGJASD
he tried
THIS POOR CAR GUY
3 warning shots
he did nothing wrong....
cloudatlas I MISREAD SOMETHING so i deleted that comment, sorry!
Mob not too far away of the mausoleum. They're not moving yet -- analyzing the situation
IT'S OKAY so much is happening
Gives time to prepare
oh my god youguys im cracking up
I can't believe we're actually playing Five Nights at Sarge's
Kino has half a mind to threaten torturing/removing fingers ever time someone tries to approach or harm them 
someone please come up with a better idea
.......that idea is right up Dazai's alley so um.
in this plan we do not actually do these things
but we do maybe kick him for convincing sounds
sOMEONE PLEASE COME UP WITH A BETTER PLAN
i feel like thats the kind of plan that should be voted on or like
'if you guys don't back off were breaking these spotlights on your heads'
give people ic a chance to argue for/against
Yeah do we want Kino to suggest it or does someone else have a better idea they would like to ICly present
hawks is talking to mason rationally
lets see what happens with hawks and mason \o/;
some days being an adult is a good option
bless Hawks
honestly, they need to convey davis needs to stay here until 6 and then they can have him back
we just want him for four more hours then honestly, please take him
I had to check the parent comment
LMFAOSKDGJ
Thank goodness Dazai isn't planning to give anyone concussions
yet
THIS IS GREAT
good lord
It's 3am........
y'all....
DAZAI CAN IF YOU WANT HIM TO. listen. it's an improvement from wanting to kill him, right.......
Okay paralysis is go
do you guys have to be chastised afterwards
goodnight friend
I'm going to have to go pass out 
hawks is offering their friend back, as long as they all camp out peacefully together
Question, is this full-body paralysis? No talking, no nothing?
man...at least the parade isn't getting sabotaged?
I assumed as much, but ya know, gotta be sure!
It can also be partial paralysis - whatever works for everyone tbh
that's next week
they can make smores
If he's awake though, he'll possibly have other symptoms like coughing and stuff
since it's a poison lol
it's.... igoing so smoothly
Everyone's doing great, honestly
refreshes impatiently
MY APOLOGIES FOR THE WAIT THERE i was looking up stuff about poison as well.
at least animal poison is better than strychnine
shoves popcorn into mouth
If no one is dead you technically haven’t failed yet 👍
Phase 2 will wind down a bit in preparation for Phase 3
It's getting close to 4:00 AM
Dazai has plans but mmmmm
Fifteen minutes for last part
i gotta start some laundry really quick don't murder any townspeople while i'm gone
okay time to kill all the townspeople
immediately unloads all bullets into the mob
sky burials the mob
If we feed the corpses to birds, no one will ever know
DO NOT
honestly....
DO NOT KILL OMG
I asked for paint and I gUESS I GOT IT
I threw it and then I saw Dazai wondering about getting paint
Things really have a way of flowing smoothly sometimes
smooth as rocks in a blender
so smoothly
smooth like flaming paint
you wish your moisturizer was this good
/burns everythig to the ground...
I can't believe I'm telling Keith to steal a car
Mason and Hawks here trying to have a civil conversation while their teams scuffle in the background
hawks is so good
hawks is better than we deserve
please assume the order to calm down is coming after...a little of this nonsense. everything is happening a bit at once, after all.
hawks is good
HAHAH
using his good looks for good
I stan Hawks
hawks is so good
Hawks is a good man
hawks is the hero we dont deserve
and then Kino tries to punch a guy in the gut/groin
I'm
sorry
hawks returns to find the man he said was fine is poisoned, just 
at everyone
at everyone
kino is the crime daughter that dazai deserves
LOOK THERE WAS NO ROOM TO DODGE AND SHE DID NOT SHOOT
the crime family grows ever larger
these are all valid hawks opinions
quick Niwa say you just wanted to calm him down with a cute bird
the poisoning was an "accident"
sometimes a family is just three or four or seven people that want to do crimes together
commented for prosperity but dont think for a second dabi wouldnt light any one of you on fire if you tried to resist giving this guy back \o
thanks Dabi
what a good bf
yw yw
tbh she totally WOULD pass it off as an accident
if she was part of this discussion
also it's not so much that Kino wants to do crimes as it is she has no problem doing crimes if she has to
really, what is a tranquilizer but a very distilled poison
Hawks handled this very well
hawks wouldn't think any of you would carry a tranq, so yeah he was trying to be polite and not call it paralysis
I mean. It isn't WRONG........ per se............
he is tranquilized
hes the hero with the second highest popularity among the public you bet your ass he's good at mob control
Half an hour of event left, everyone
The police and firemen didn't get the memo and they're going to try their best
....yeah hmm!!!
mmmm that's not good
good work niwa
the icon was obligatory
is it... is it time to steal a car NOW...
i think we can probs have mason try asking them to back down
STEAL THE CAR
why steal a car
whats the point of stealing a car anyway
poison a pilot, steal a helicopter
...helicopters are nicer
Mason is on your side! Kind of!!
Dazai and Niwa just fuck off into the sky
yeah let's keep him on our side....
frankly I could never hurt Nanette like that, her pb is Carter from Person of Interest and she deserves better
And also mobility is hindered
Careful, don't trip on a coffin or on mud
time to see if hawks can negotiate nanette down
oh. well. that's cool.
Hawks continues to try his very best and I appreciate him.
--HEY NOW
dazai would like to argue that his face is just fine, but he's more happy to have a fine excuse to raise hell
lmao dazai is cracking me up rn
he's 100% ready to put someone in the box and present them as davis
Kino does not approve of this plan
...smh
can we just... argue with the cops for the 30 event minutes
and then hand davis over like "actually yeah have him bye"
or well something if they can get something heavy enough
....gives them the paint can
instead of argue, someone run to the gas station and get drinks
graveyard tea party
or gants idea of ice cream
i liked the ice cream
free ice cream on them???
just be careful, everything's muddy
maybe walk casually
ICE CREAM PARTY
gants idea was the best
ice cream would be good
gg gant
The tourists during the event in a nutshell: 
y e p
HONESTLY
niwa also being a hero distracting the helicopter
Bird related distractions are a huge success in general, surprisingly
These townspeople love birbs
birbs
Fuck yeah birbs!
Maybe Hawks also counts as a bird related distraction
He's the bird squadron leader
the birbs were really the heroes we needed
these rookies are killing me
I love them
protect this police force
The experienced ones were trying to get in via helicopter and got defeated by birds, while the rookies were on foot. Meanwhile the firemen jeers at people from the sidelines
Is it obvious the authorities haven't dealt with any crimes before?
Except Nanette, who is the one competent person and that's why she gets a face, haha
gosh...
When you're competent around here you get a face AND a name
here's looking at you Fireman #2
the fact that Osomatsu of all people can't deal with any of this ridiculous bullshit is a sign from the heavens
we made mistakes
honestly valid
that's fair, no one should ever have to deal with dazai
that's valid
A couple posts more after this, and the event is over
Kino is... I wouldn't say used to Dazai-brand bullshit but his logic coincides enough with logic she's used to
that's so sad
Least they can’t blame ALL the damage on the tourists this time...
and by that I mean morbid and weird.
Blame it all on Dazai tbh
just this one tourist
I just have this image of Dazai going YEET with him and he goes face first into the mud
Nick's still got one more thing for you guys that Kino and Natalie are investigating, but at least you're not getting arrested?
Sarge vanished bodies, huh.
Man that’s gonna be a heck of a paper
w e l p
Final post. And with that, it's done
Thanks a lot for your efforts in tonight's event!
thank you for running it, mods! it was a ton of fun
That was a great time thanks mods!!
y, thank you for this event it was a good time!
it was very fun to read
Thank you thank you!!
/wakes up, catches up
Good lord everyone in this town is a disaster regardless of player character status
anyways I saw this on tumblr and thought of this event Ginshi
LOL I LOVE THAT COMIC
This event was something. Makes me sad I missed the end but I'd nearly been up 24 hours
That was hawks in the beginning before he went “you know what? Imma do this”
this event still feels like a fever dream
can't wait to see how the newspaper's going to spin this