Long story short, after being at least five different treatments that haven't helped and one recent clinical trial that hasn't done anything for me, the doctors have pretty much told me that there's not much else they can do.

There's another thing going on at NIH for Hogkin's Lymphoma, but it was iced due to toxicity issues with the patients, so while they have me on a list because my doctor put in a good word for me with them, unless that opens up, I'm..pretty much done.

I've got a couple of months left before my body really starts breaking down and putting me in a world of hurt. After that..that'll be it.

So, if there's anything any of you want to do with me (RP-related things, game things, just a general chat), just hit me up here.

But even if you don't, I figured all of you deserved to know. I might have been away from here for a long time, but..that doesn't mean I still don't think of you guys as my friends.

Oh. Oh, jesus christ.

Hang in there. Please.

I don't know what to say. I'm not even sure if there is something right that I can say, but I want to, need to say something or I might regret not having done so.

Don't give up hope, fight. Live. Do all the things you haven't done yet, see as much as you can.

It might be easy for me to say because I'm not there in person and to be honest, all I'm thinking right now is "this is not fair". Fuck, I can't even word properly right now, I'm trying my hardest to do so.

I don't know. I just… I want you to be okay and happy.

AliaShepard: I'll do my best, but I can't really change the reality of the situation either, y'know?

At least I was expecting to hear news like this, so I took it a bit easier in the doctor's room than my dad did.

Yeah, I'm wholly aware of that. I've been struggling to come up with anything to say that feels like it won't be insensitive, and it doesn't help that I've had to face this kind of music at least once already.

But this is one of those times where I wish I could.

kitorin: Hey, it's alright if you can't think of anything good to say right now. It's always difficult to know just what to say in situations like this.

But don't worry! I probably won't get everything done, but I'll be doing my hardest to finish up the stories I want to get done and experience as much as I can before things really start to go belly-up. ^^

AliaShepard: Ah, shit, I'm sorry to hear that. ><; Situations like this are never easy to deal with, so I'm sorry that this isn't the first time you've had to be on the receiving end for news like this.

But..it's fine if you can't think of anything good to say right now. Even just knowing that you guys want to and think that this is unfair helps. ^^;

A cousin of my dad had the same thing and he made it when nobods thought he could, so I want to believe that as long as there's a chance that you can too. I know that time will come for us all one day. But I'll be honest, I am having a hard time to wrap my head around these news and am trying now to break down in tears at work.

*not to

This isn't just unfair for me. It's fucked up.

I can't... I just can't stand the idea of being stuck where I can't reach someone in times like this. At least with the first person I lost to some form of cancer, I got to see before she lost the fight. This is just... ugh.

I wish I could do something to help. I wish there was something I could say, but nothing sounds right. Just know that we’re here for you and are always, always rooting for you.

I'm really late in here, but hon I am so sorry to hear this. You are the sweetest and you deserve all the best. I'm so glad to hear you are going to do all you can while you still can though. I've known too many people who get that kinda news and just give up.

Oh. Oh, my God. I... I really don’t know what to say. Or if there’s even anything to say. I’m sorry that this is happening, but I’m glad that you’re going to everything you can while you still can? Still, though, this is just...

I don’t know if there’s anything I can do. But I’m here, and I’m also rooting for you. You have my support, my prayers, my Internet hugs... everything I can offer.

i'm just... i'm so sorry. i still want to believe that there is still chance, and that things will be better for you. ugh, it's... so unfair, you deserve so much better. please know that we love and care for you, and we will be here for you. please let us know if there is anything we can do.

god, i've been sitting on this too, wondering what i should say i'm so sorry this is happening. i always remember your tags as such a bright light in my inbox! i hope you get to do everything you want to do and please let me know if there's anything you'd like to do together!

This plurk has been a year old and I found something by chance today. If anyone knew what Livia looked like in RL I'd please like you to confirm if it's her or not.

Livia Langley Obituary, Springfield, Virginia