My allergies have been hell lately (normal for spring) and I know I've been a bit shaky because I'm trying to find the balance between meals and adderall-lowered appetite

and then, yesterday, my big brother told us he has confirmed COVID and he thought he got it from our dad when we had a bday get together last week

and I was suddenly 100% convinced this was finally me getting COVID, and I was devastated because Autumn's wedding is this weekend and I wouldn't be able to be there

Got an at-home test because it was too late in the day to schedule an actual appointment

negative

Got the official test today. Negative

and I'm so relieved, but also still shaky and just....yeah

it's like the adrenaline and disappointment and the actual symptoms from allergies just all collided and now I'm just left feeling bleh

And I want to be upset or whine or complain or...something...but if I say anything on social media, my big brother still is actually sick

and I'm not and it seems weird and petulant to be all stressed after NOT having it