there was much crylaughing

so much

unable to fall back asleep b/c of hunger, so i'm thinking about Alan's forearms again

just... gonna dump some screenshots from the dark place trailer while i figure out what to eat

checking my emails and see the what?

it just keeps happening

it does

I see it now. The question. How do you run from an idea? From a thought? From a story in your head? You can't escape your fears. You carry your monsters with you. The devil on your back. It's in you. You're running-[cuts off from here]
text from this booth footage:

chewing on that

also, rehearsal for a book signing scene aaaaaaaaaaaaa

i still can't believe like....

we get alan with longer hair

it was so SO short in the original release of the game b/c ilkka villi's hair was really short when they first made his character model, and they made it longer to be on the same kinda level as his hair in the War music video by Poets of the Fall

and ilkka villi keeps his hair longer now but i cannot believe that like

long hair alan

i always look at my special little guys with shorter hair and go "hm but what if.... hair longer?" so this is such a treat for me

i know it's probably mostly because of the whole

blending video and game

element

and he probably has his hair longer b/c of other projects he's doing as an actor but still

this was for me specifically

alan in AW1 2010 release had like....

specifically an awful fucking haircut i was given ironically also in 2010 when i took a photo of a guy from a kpop band to a salon and asked for that haircut and they were like "are you sure" because i was early in my transition and did not pass

and so they gave me the shittest femmed up bad lesbian haircut version of what i asked for

like... that's what alan's original hair reminds me of lol

i'm glad they changed it in aw remastered