vent stuff: Man, I have an appointment tomorrow, that I can't physically go to because i'm still disgusting coughing, even though i'm definitely on the upswing now (but i don't want to risk getting anyone sick), so my choices are either don't go, but i've already missed both apt. last week, or do a video apt. and I don't want to do either option 
I know my brain, and i am BAD with video calls, and sometimes audio calls in general, I just sorta lose words sometimes or zone out and can't drag myself back for a bit, and the fact that it would have to be on my phone means i wouldn't be able to see anything anyway, which will diminish things A LOT
but I also don't want to miss ANOTHER appointment, like, yeah I'm sick, and I know she'll understand, but I feel like garbage even considering that
I can use some headphones, so that'll help my auditory problems somewhat, but i'm pissed I can't find my actual webcam, because even the cheap thing would be better than my phone
Ugh, I guess it'll largely depend on whether I think I can talk for an hour tomorrow or if i'm coughing too much at that point, though hot tea and theraflu has been helping manage it well enough that I think I could do it, it would just sound horrible lmao
so that's probably what i SHOULD do, no matter how much i'll hate it, because i've already lost so much momentum that I can feel my 'i'm not doing anything, it doesn't matter' kicking back in and we don't like thaaaaaaaaat
the worst part is that i don't feel tired at all right now when i REALLY should be sleeping lol
I HOPE THAT IT WORKS OUT NO MATTER WHAT U PICK 
AND THAT IF U CANT GO TO THIS APPT, THAT U CAN BOOK ANOTHER ONE REAL SOON ONCE UR BETTER