I talked to a doctor today and I'm going on antidepressants.

Which feels like a bit of a failure to resolve things myself but I've had to accept that I probably can't do it, and in the event that it is just wonky brain chemistry this is the sensible thing to do.

It's a big step for me though and I'm told they can make anxiety worse at first so idk

Worth a try at this point though.

Definitely not a failure.

thank you

not at all a failure. I am on antidepressants and they have vastly improved my life. it's no different then any other tool we use to improve our health.

Antidepressants to resolve a mental illness aren't a failure of the mind any more than antibiotics to resolve an infection are a failure of the immune system

^^^ 100% what Yon said

Thank you, you are all right. I am just one of these people who tries to fix even physical things myself and avoid doctors as much as I can. Which works to a point but not with everything (I did go to hospital with an infection when 'not serious, give my immune system time' and over the counter remedies failed lol)

But yeah I did not feel bad about that and think oh why didn't my body just fix itself? So that's a good way to look at it.

Really if it makes a difference it doesn't matter how!

^ I'm on antidepressants too it's all chemicals (literally it's for my migraines/paralysis)

You really can't fix things like that via sheer willpower/desire

Yeah I guess it is not so unusual! I really appreciate the support from everyone <3 I can't talk to RL family because I have too many addict relatives (to both prescribed and other stuff) so the general attitude is that if you never start taking anything you can't end up like that.

Just have to tell myself that is not a representative sample and most people on antidepressants don't end up slippery-slope addicted to stronger stuff.

I definitely think I am doing the right thing! But keeping it secret IRL doesn't help with conflicted feelings so genuinely thank you all for sharing thoughts that balance that out!

Echoing what others have said but it's definitely not a failure at all!

Thank you <3 you guys are awesome

Nah nah anti-depressants actually help prevent other addictions

<- my family has problems with it too, grandparents are severe teetotallers (so is Moosey) but Moosey was addicted to peanutbutter (his allergy) me to work + weightlifting,

your body is just like "man I really need SOMETHING to balance this out..." and will find one if you don't

one thing to keep in mind is that, like other medications, it can take a little time and experimenting to dial in the right dose and to find the right match for you. knowing that going in can be helpful so you don't get too discouraged while you're still finding the right one

yes

Just echoing what everyone else here has said. I hope it helps and makes things easier