Your parents paid your iPhone, MacBook and bought you car? And they're paying for your school? Please, tell me how hard your life is.
I love that super cute thing where you don't text me back for hours. Gah, so adorable.
You are cordially invited to shut the fuck up.
No offense but I'm about to offend you.
"Want to go out?"
"I have a boyfriend"
"I have a math test tomorrow"
"And?"
"Oh, I thought we were naming things we could cheat on."
books that she already know the ending.
I hate it when my body is like, 'Time to sneeze!' Then its all, 'LOL JK'
"Dude that song is old".... "Well so is your mom but you still listen to her"
That awkward moment when your mom is doing the dishes and you slowly put your dish into the sink...