To the owner of the orange hummer: I hope you didn't need your tires.

it just me or are people a little more amorous than usual?

There is a god. And they live in the basement.

Do not drink the purple glowing shots.

I may or may not be stranded on the roof of the science department.

To whoever made away with the potted plant hidden behind the greenhouse: Do not smoke it.

Anyone know where I can find a reputable tattoo parlor?